12

Symposium – a social gathering at which there is free interchange of ideas, a formal meeting at which several specialists deliver short addresses on a topic or related topics, a collection of opinions on a subject

Dr. Wiggington – If he had sideburns, I would diagnose him as a confused young man, unsure of his sexuality.

Dr. Tames – Who talketh, walketh the scoffeth.

Dr. Reavis – All right, all right, lets begin this.  Let me take roll.  In no particular order. 

Dr. Reavis – Dr. Reavis… oh, that’s me, Here and last, but certainly not least, Dr. Tames.

Dr. Gonzalez – Let me say my piece first.  As all of you know, I have been on several missions to the canals of the deep pacific.  I have seen all kinds of life down there.  There are many beautiful life forms on this planet.  We all come from organisms and bacteria.  When life began here on Earth, it was not God who made us in his own image.  But rather it was the right temperature.  We, as earthlings, are a fluke of the universe.  Life is not a miracle, but the human brain, most definitely is, if there is such a things as miracles.  How is it, that we lonely apes, because we did in fact evolve from primates, were able to invent language.  We even went further with language for we had uses for it.  How is it that a person can write words to communicate with someone else.  Let us look at communication.  That is very much an earthling invention.

If aliens exist, I believe water would destroy these beings, because water to a life form, is a very alien thing.  Only on this planet, does water exist.  In this whole universe, there is not one planet, who’s gasses have evolved into water, that ever great life-bringer.  Science proves that water has created life, so how can life be elsewhere, if water does not exist elsewhere, or rather, cannot exist in this universe.  Perhaps in a black hole, with anti-matter, but that is heading in the realm of mathematics and physics, and I only know of the biology and geology and mariners of ancient lore.

If aliens exist, I believe water would destroy these beings, because water to a life form, is a very alien thing.  Only on this planet, does water exist.  In this whole universe, there is not one planet, who’s gasses have evolved into water, that ever great life-bringer.  Science proves that water has created life, so how can life be elsewhere, if water does not exist elsewhere, or rather, cannot exist in this universe.  Perhaps in a black hole, with anti-matter, but that is heading in the realm of mathematics and physics, and I only know of the biology and geology and mariners of ancient lore.

Dr. Tames – Get off his piece now.  Why doesn’t someone lighten this place up and enlighten this etude.

Dr. Bruce – Let me go on.  I want to be the voice of reason in this haphazard talk we are undertaking.  As you all know, I am a mathematician.  I don’t believe in anything, unless it can be proven.  Why, the only truth I know, which is the only truth in the whole universe, has got to be the concept of two plus two.  No matter what, two plus two will always equal four.  If we are on Neptune, and an extra-terrestrial had two ships and then it had two more flying ships, the total is four.  The same on Earth, two rocks plus two more rocks will always come out to four rocks.  It will never be five rocks, nor will it be ten rocks.  Look at your hands, everybody, you got two fingers and you add two more fingers, this is so simple, what do you have?   Now, it may be called something else, wherever you go, be it Uranus, or Venus, but this four is universal.

Therefore, it is hard for me to believe in something which mathematics can disprove.  What Dr. Gonzalez was hinting at, was the mathematical formula known as Drake’s Equation.  This equation proves that life on this planet is a fluke.  God did not put us here.  God did not have a garden of Eden and made woman out of Adam’s rib.  No.  There is no life anywhere in the universe.  The universe is composed of gasses and energy.  Is energy life?  That is a question that philosophers have struggled with since the dawn of time.  And what has trying to figure out that question ever got the philosopher?  Nothing.  The philosopher either went insane from thinking too much, lived alone much of his/her life because it never got off its stoop of thinking, he let women live their lives without him.  What did they write, nothing but boring tracts where cogito ergo sum, seems to be the penultimate idea.  No, we most definitely are the only thinking race in this whole universe.  Only the human race could devise racism, only the human race could devise murder, only a human could love a human, for we humans are just too, I don’t know, what can you say, human?

Albeit, there are some diseases that can alter the human biology, just as well.  How is that possible, you might be asking yourselves?  Any of you doctors of high estimation ever come across a subject that had the Floe-jowls?  Any of you?  Naysayers beware.  This is a disease that transforms the patient’s epidermis into a crocodile-like species, which in the final stages, some patients have come out resembling the features of an alien.  The common alien;  the extra-terrestrial that is most described by all the nitwits and pundits in this society, from the shores of Tripoli, to the banks of the Hudson River, to the ends of the Nile, to the heights of the Himalayas.  You do know of what alien I am referring to;  the alien being that most of the people who have been abducted have claimed to have seen.  The being that is gray, about four feet tall, that comes and abducts them wherever they are, especially when they are sleeping.  Always when they are sleeping?  What is the deal?

Now, compare this report of sleep paralysis to a report of alien abduction, and when they are put side by side, you must be an ignorant person to dispute that these two occurrences do not seem similar.  Alien abductees report a state of paralysis, just as I have observed at the Sleeping Institute.  Alien abductees also report that they cannot speak, just like the subject who is under sleep paralysis.  Do you doctors see where I am going with this?

Aliens are not coming from Venus, Mars, or Uranus.  They are not from the Cancer Constellation, from some black holes, from under the sea.  They are not from the future coming to the past to see what went wrong.  They are not communicating with us, with crop circles, or megaliths, or pictures on the sides of mountains, or through petty abductions, because my fellow doctors, in the end, kidnapping is a petty crime

If perhaps, extra-terrestrials were coming to Earth, how would they communicate with us?  How would they convey messages to us?  I think the only way they can communicate with us, is by abducting humans.  They come to Earth, perform oral surgeries, anal probes, and other tests, that we find so horrible.  Its like this.  When we were kids, we all had magnifying glasses which we used to torture the ants with.  Don’t you remember?  What was the purpose of that?  We had the power, is the only reason I can think of today why we tortured those ants.  We humans are way bigger, thousand times bigger than the ants.  Therefore we could stomp and drown them, because we are the dominant species.

A planet full of primates, especially primates that can walk and talk and go into outer space, and write books, and add up two plus two, and play music, and tear down mountains, and kill off humanity.  All of us monkeys, with opposable thumbs, grabbing items, which no other animal on the planet can do.  But the most important of all our inventions, is the ability of speech.  There it is again, communication efforts.  Our speech is special, it is unique, as is our writing.  Out thought processes.  What makes a human write an autobiography.  We write and speak of ourselves, we idolize each other.  We watch television shows were we see beautiful humans and it pushes emotions in us that make us want to be beautiful like the humans we see on magazines or television.  That is something I can’t grasp, because we are all very beautiful, in a certain way, who has the ability, the gall to say this woman is more beautiful than this other one.  What sparks our brains to distinguish such ideas in our little heads?  Is the appearance of extra-terrestrials something that we humans need so we can realize that no one is more special than anybody else.  In the very end, my neighbor, my wife, my children, my mother, my father, my siblings, my ex-girlfriends, all of them, the president of the United States, Albert Einstein, A. Hitler, Glenn Gould, all of us, are simply monkeys.

Dr. Smith – Anyways, let me start off by saying, once again to get everyone in order again, that the whole existence of alien life forms are false.  They are fake.  They do not exist.  They are a figment of imagination.  From the writings of Haydon in the Aurora, Texas sightings, to the paintings of UFO’s above Mary Magdalene; aliens are nothing but a figment of our imagination.  Once one person, on drugs nonetheless, starts to see and reports alien abductions, it gets the ball rolling.  Others come forward, and they tell of how they too have been abducted.  They lift their stories of abductions from the people who are making them up.  They too want to feel special; they are just a copy of an original.  In our post-modern world, even our lives are lives that have already been lived; we are just usurping them because we have nothing else to do.  Therefore, these new victims of ‘aliens’ are also abducted while they are sleeping.

Now if you add the epidemic that is destroying our county, which is drugs, it makes these hallucinations a bit worse.  They become nightmares to the victim.  Where sleep deprivation only brings about dreams of abductions, a drug psychosis brings on the nightmares of kidnappings and anal probes and death.  People with insomnia, speak of horrors that they see daily, but you mix up drugs that don’t make you fall asleep, and bam, the psychosis only gets worse.  Mix up sleep deprivation and methamphetamines or opiates and you have people saying they are getting abducted nightly.

How is it that so many people around the world have the same visions?  These are people from all walks of life, people who we have tried to find a connection between them, and all we have found, all of us in the scientific community, have found nothing to link them together.  They have the same signs, from bright lights to missing time, same drawings of saucer-shaped ships to cigar looking vessels, same beings, which is the same picture thousands of people around the globe have drawn from their own memories, same abduction stories, where the abducted is picked up late at night, and prodded my several gray beings and also several troll looking ones, and they all seem to see the same alien.  How can people see the same creatures, night after night, describe the same tests, when these people don’t even know each other, much less they are separated by thousands of miles, from oceans to oceans, from one distant culture to another distant one. 

In short, the alien being, the gray being, the one who controls the spaceship, that creature has become, in our society, the new boogey-man.  There are no more stories that scare our children to sleep.  Gone is the tale of the werewolf on big full-moon nights.  The vampire, ha! he has become childish fodder, for he doesn’t scare people anymore, but rather people want to become the undead.  Our kids look in any mall, and you will see the remnants of a gothic culture.  And serial killers, well, there are so many now, that most of the time the person next door to you is so deviant that he or she is going out and participating in a killing spree, with anthrax, with snipers, with terroristic planes, you name it, and its been played out in our culture so much, it is no longer taboo. 

And since we are talking about taboo subjects and Satan, then what do any of you have to comment on the practicing of anal probes.  Why do so many abductees complain of getting anal probes?  Is our fecal matter that important to other species of life, is our dung so fascinating to E.T., that they must penetrate a phallus into our rectum for ‘research purposes’.  I don’t know, but to me, it looks like some of these abductees just want to be prodded anally.  Anal sex is still so taboo in the bedroom, that what if an alien, which is the equivalent of Satan, is just coming in our bedrooms late at night, to explore our sexual frustrations.  Is the alien, just a nice Satan, who comes and probes our humans anally?  My friends, my fellow colleague, just exactly who is reaching climax at these soirees.

These are deep sexual undertones, no pun intended, about the fact that many people do love anal sex.  Look at the Greeks, the Romans, the modern Indians, each of these cultures loved anal sex.  Depictions of sodomy are shown in pieces of pottery, frescoes, vases.  If the same idea was so open today, why my neighbors would have a coffee book filled with pictures of sodomy.  Somewhere along the way, sodomy became taboo, so our sexual minds, because all us humans, no matter if we are male or female, we all think of sex all day long.  Sodomy was a practice that was enjoyed among both sexes, but somewhere in history, it was outlawed, and the act became an act only deviants did.  The Christians had something to do with the death of sodomy, for having anal sex, become the bad way to have sex, because no impregnating of women was to occur.  Us humans, we love sex so much, we are the dominant species on our planet. 

My research however, has shown me, that many people on this Earth suffer from a bad case of Mass Hysteria.  Let me put it this way, if one person contracts an ailment, and this ailment garners much attention from many aspects of society, be it the television news, newsprint, senators, or just plain anybody, very shortly, others start to come out with the same symptoms, and they too get that national attention that puts them on the map, so to speak.  And if you give it some more time, before anyone knows it, a whole country could be affected with this ailment.

Or take for instance, the events of October 23, 2005.  At this date, one male passenger on a flight from Phoenix to Boston suddenly got ill on the airplane.  He complained and moaned that he had this illness that transpired from the free drink he got in his first class privileges.  Within the hour, the passengers in the third class flight, they too started to complain of having gushing sweats and feelings of immanent danger.  They too got a free drink from the flight attendant, so they had all got the same symptoms.  When the plane landed, it arrived at Atlanta early because the passengers were starting an uproar, and they wanted control of the air vessel; anyways, every passenger on the plane had to be taken to the E.R.  The following month all the passengers sued the airline, with a class-action lawsuit that centered on the free drinks that were passed around.

It takes one person to speak of how they were abducted.  Then they are the ‘stars’ of all these daytime and nighttime talk shows.  One person gets their fifteen minutes of fame, and then five million other people want to be famous too. Others start to feel as if they have been abducted also.  Of course the media intervenes, and we all know how much of an influence the media has on all of us television junkies. 

The media itself has to be the one aspect in society that gives us all these nightmares to feed us this alien mass hysteria.  Through the media, there are movies of aliens destroying the world, t-shirts of Roswell, New Mexico, television sit-coms and dramedy shows that are about extra-terrestrials.  Books about alien abduction, books that try to explain close encounter of the third kind to the public.  Every way one turns, there is an instance that people can read that says that alien life forms do exist.  And us the public, we eat it all, we ingest the information like the super-information highway, and we keep it in our heads, and late at night, we have nightmares, which start the mass hysteria, and before you know it, our children are having the same nightmares, our neighbors are now having the same dreams, because these nightmares are so frequent, we are no longer afraid of them anymore.  It is like the idea of Satan.  For thousands of years, Satan scared most people to be good citizens, but the more we dreamt him, the less evil he became, and in the end, Satan became an angel of God who wanted to be like his Father, but he was cast out because he could not be his own man.  We started to portray Satan as a man, and the more he became man, in the end, Satan was just another mad man on this Earth, and by that time, we humans knew how to imprison men with minds that evil.  Be it with prisons and bars, or prisons of the mind, we humans became doctors that knew how to take care of deranged individuals such as Satan.  Satan was no longer a boogey-man, so we had to find a new idea to scare us, and what better than a being from another world.  The alien is like Satan, the alien is not of this earth, the alien is at first evil, but the more we see the alien in print, the more comfortable we humans get with the idea of alien abduction.  This alien phenomenon will one day be nothing.  It will become like Satan, scary at first, but in the end a joke.  And this joke will not even be funny.

Dr. Smith – What’s that commotion outside?  Do you hear it?

Dr. Miller – NO!, it sounds like terror!

(the door to the room the professors are sitting in, collapses.  And in struts in, this four foot being, a gray, with large eyes and a ray gun is his hand)

 

ALIEN - ^^%?>%%@##~~`~`~

            ~~~`~~`~~~~~`

            (loud screams, followed by louder screams of help.  Minutes pass and the ALIEN walks out, leaving a room covered in blood and lifeless feet)